The Many Faces of Abuse
Our society seems to be corrupted by abuse. Abuse is to use, or wrongly hurt a person in a harmful or offensive way. Abuse is considered a pattern of learned behavior, and was derived from the Latin word abus in the 15th century, which later changed to abuse in Old French. Even though many people find abuse wrong and immoral, it has been widely overlooked in the past decades due to the people’s lack of knowledge on the subject. It happens in many ways and though it is never acceptable, these violence’s seem to be reoccurring in today’s world. The many faces of abuse can be, but is not limited to, mental, physical, and sexual exploitations.
Many people endure mental abuse, which is damaging a person’s state of mind. When someone calls another person vulgar names, or calls them “worthless,” they are being mentally abusive. Mental abuse is the mean father that told his little girl that, “the “B” she got wasn’t good enough, that only idiots can’t make an “A” on that science test.” Mental abuse is not the prided father giving his daughter a high-five because she got a “B” on her science test. The outraged mother who tells her hungry children they are, “no good and they don’t deserve a snack,” is being mentally abusive, it is not, however, the loving mother who made her children brownies to satisfy their hungry tummies after a long school day. Abuse has no prejudice against its victims. These acts happen to children, adults, as well as the elderly, and it does not matter if the victim is a male or female. To them, it just matters that there is a victim to abuse. It can happen to anyone, it could even happen to the person reading these words.
Many people are also faced with physical abuse throughout their lives. Physical abuse is a forceful, and unwanted act of contact with a person, or a person’s body resulting in injury. Physical abuse is grabbing someone in anger, pulling someone’s hair, or forcing injury upon a person. Throwing objects, hitting, kicking, scratching, and even strangling the victims are other abusive behaviors. The overwhelmed babysitter who continuously hits the crying infant is being physically abusive to the innocent child. Physical abuse is the anger coming from the young man’s abusive hands in his moment of rage at the young lady. The angry abusive man, wants honor, but there is none with anger. The upset lady throwing her cup directly at her husband was being physically abusive. It is not the nurturing mother kissing her child’s forehead after he fell off his bike. Physical abuse is not the loyal protesters demonstrating their opinions in a peaceful nature. People have faced these horrible and invasive acts since the beginning of time, and with more knowledge that means more awareness.
In addition, to mental and physical abuse there is sexual abuse. Sexual abuse is an unwanted sexual act when the perpetrator uses force, makes threats, or takes extreme advantage of their victims. Many forms of sexual abuse are rape, incest, fondling, and even pornography. These forms of abuse can happen once or they can be reoccurring. Sexual abuse is the child blinded by the flash of her uncle’s camera as she sits cold and naked on the bed. Sexual abuse is not the concerned mother constantly reminding her children, to be careful, and never let another person touch their private parts. It is though, the step-father grabbing his young step-daughter’s breast as she passes by him. Sexual abuse is the confusion a child is lost in after her step dad crept into her bedroom yesterday morning. It is a very cloudy haze that can be an overwhelming struggle to overcome.
In today’s society it is critical to be knowledgeable about mental, physical, and sexual abuse, because if these horrific crimes become acceptable, we as a society will have our rights abused. No matter the age or gender, people should know the signs and facts about every category of abuse that occurs. The damage caused is a major topic that needs not to be silenced. Society needs to learn, recognize, and stop all of these heinous crimes.
A Victim’s Perspective
Think of in recent news. Bill Cosby Aka Dr. Huckstable. Many people have come forth with accusations, some of which were ones who actually told at the time of the instances. They were turned away. No one listened. Now, consider being a seven year old and having your stepfather give you a big nasty hickey on your innocent neck, or being a 15 year old, who’s treated physically and emotionally as if an adult’s play toy? I have and it isn’t something that should be taken lightly whether it’s believable or not. It happens more often than not and if people would learn to connect the signs and really listen and break the silence, then maybe the statistics of these crimes I experienced would reduce in number. Fyi “• 1 in 5 girls and 1 in 20 boys is a victim of child sexual abuse and•Children are most vulnerable to CSA between the ages of 7 and 13,” according to an article titled, Child Sexual Abuse Statistics, by The National Center For Victims of Crime.
The discussions, along with prevention programs have made it possible for people to pursue someone who will listen, but sometimes that’s not even enough. Imagine being a scared 7 year old girl that broke the silence but the child’s words were severely overlooked. This is where the problem begins. Not only was her trust broken once by the stepfather, but also by the bystanders not taking her words as the truth. Instances like this happen way too often, whether by ignorance of not listening to a victim, being scared of the realities it may bring, or even someone’s stature. In return the child feels betrayed by all involved and shuts down. Consequently, the silence of the matter clouds everyone’s judgment. In recent years It’s been publicized more, making a seemingly impact on the awareness of the topic of sexual abuse.
I and many other children learn some very hard and horrific life lessons at a young age, which will follow them every day, for the rest of their lives. We have to be able to break the silence. Children who endure such treatment can be so tormented by the events, that they can become a perpetrator themselves, become apprehensible to ever accept the truth, or it can give them the power and strength to give birth to a justified speaker on the subject. This is where the prevention programs have come from, along with students just doing assignments for a college class. Many people, whether victims or not, have made it their life’s work, and have broken the silence on this topic compared to past generations. If our society keeps talking and teaching about crimes of abuse, then maybe one day everyone will be safe.
Sexual abuse victims have difficulties trusting people, but when silence is broken, and people are open about the topic, then we can make a huge impact on these crimes. The memories intrude on every moment of the person’s existence. It makes relationships more difficult later in life, whether it be just an associate in everyday life, or a personal companion situation. Abuse can cause people to use drugs and alcohol, as well as commit suicide, amongst many other things. These memories, even when people try so hard to forget, never leave. There’s always that voice in the back of your head, saying Watch Out, even during moments that don’t need judgments.
In conclusion and great gratitude, with my highest hopes, that we break this silence, so our society’s belief that child sex crimes are wrong, will gain interest and demand. I hope everyone knows that as a victim of abuse, it is very hard to find understanding in these crimes. The impact is unimaginable, but with openness of these discussions then our society will be able to begin to heal. I believe its time our society breaks the silence of these violence’s of society..
Sources
2012 © Child Sexual Abuse Statistics, by The National Center For Victims of Crime, http://www.victimsofcrime.org/media/reporting-on-child-sexual-abuse/child-sexual-abuse-statistics
Abuse
